It goes without saying that at one point in your child's life, his big brother or sister will boss him around. Your busy work/life schedule and all the after-school activities may allow your parenting to fall by the wayside. You may not see what's going on until it's too late. Now, your youngest is bossing YOU around. At first, you may think it's cute. However, don't let it get too far.
"If your child is constantly bossing you and his siblings around, if he resists all your requests, if he doesn’t seem to have the ability to follow, it is because he is begging for you to let him lead," says Viki de Lieme, of parentsenlight.com and a nonviolent communication specialist. Lieme says to learn what it is that he needs and once you figure that out, often times the bossiness diminishes. She offers these tips to help parent those bossy children of yours:
- Let him choose. Choices on many things like the color of his spoon, what to wear, where to go, etc., that give him a little control over (and that you already approve of) help.
- Give him work. Find a unique job he can do to feel in control over a situation.
- Envelope obligatory tasks with choices. If it's bath time, don't make it a struggle. Offer a role playing theme to it like a safari and pretend you're looking for animals, etc.
- Envelope your refusals with choices. Offer other choices to his request that you don't approve of instead of just denying him the one thing.
- Trust him when he tells you how he feels. When he's trusted to know how he feels, he will never refuse a hat and a jacket when he actually needs it.
- Ask for his help. He will love that you asked and you should show him the purest gratitude for it, too.
- Don’t tell him what to say. If you order the words to be said, they'll never come from his heart.