A baby born during the holidays is a lot to manage on top of everything else, but many of us have been there. And you have to name your baby. With my first child, in December, I didn’t know if I’d have a boy or girl (secretly I wanted a girl), but pretty much from the moment I found out I was expecting, the name game began. Baby naming is a full-fledged industry, everybody from aunts and uncles to cousins will get involved if you let them. What’s so important about a name? It’s important enough that plenty of parents keep it private these days. Names matter.
Old Hollywood knew. Studio heads were never going to put “Archibald Leach” on a movie marquee, so his name became Gary Grant. Norma Jean Mortenson became Marilyn Monroe. And name changing became absolutely common place if you wanted to become a star. It continues today. Lady Gaga ditched Stefani Gemanotta. The stuff of John Legend might not have happened if he’d kept John Stephens. In the oh-so-important naming of your baby, remember: they can change it.
In labor, waiting to deliver my baby, my husband and I worked on a list. We had a bunch of boy names we liked and a bunch of girl names. We said them outloud, tried them out. But we couldn’t settle and we weren’t serious and everything got scribbled out. Finally I said, let’s see the baby and then we’ll know.
And in the back of my mind was a memory. I was wandering through a children’s section in a bookstore long before I was expecting and saw, “Alexandra Day” on the cover a Good Dog, Carl board book. Alexandra Day was the author (but guess what? The author’s real name is Sandra Darling!). I thought that was the most beautiful name I’d ever seen in print. (You DO have to write it out, at least a gazillion times, in your fanciest hand writing). So when I finally got to peek at my little holiday bundle, I said, “Oh! This is Alexandra!” And so she was and so she is. And it’s her real name.
Baby two was a boy, and because I loved that ER actor Noah Wyle, my little Noah arrived right on time one cold November evening, long before everybody started naming their boys Noah. Baby three’s name honored a dear friend, only, we didn’t think about the monogram. We named him Tucker Radford Day which equals TRD. Just shy of one initial to spell something pretty nasty, my boy stared hard at those initials when they were stitched on a ball cap in a Lids store. He never wore that cap. Sorry, Tuck.
Baby four and again, we didn’t know! Here we were in the delivery room with lists again. Then my father-in-law called in and said with no prompting, “You know, Thomas Jefferson is a good name.” We skipped the Jefferson, but Thomas it was and has always been.
It’s personal, naming names. Mixing first, middle and last names. And nobody’s shy about sharing their opinions about names, so I get keeping them a secret. If you tell people the names you have picked out, you risk their adverse opinions … and suggestions.
Here in the south, we use a lot of double names: Ann Lane, Mary Clare, Jack Wyatt, John Michael. But there’s no hard and fast rule you have to adhere to. Old-fashioned names are popular at the moment, so take a good look at your ancestral tree. In the meantime, your baby’s name can come from your life … with good reason … named because something was happening in the moment and it struck you. Or just wait to see that darling face. And maybe it will come to you. And then he’ll grow up to be rich and famous. And change it!
