No matter how many books you absorb, how many new parent guides you absorb or articles you read, the truth is, nothing can completely prepare you for a new baby. Meanwhile, millions of parents have been there before you. Here’s great advice from parents who have learned from their first-time newborn experiences — keeping in mind that one of the most important elements to parenting is trusting your instincts and intuition.
According to Psychology Today, motherly intuition has research to back it up. The clear, unconscious sense that something is right — or wrong — is a natural internal alert within you regarding the wellness of your baby. This will grow and develop as your baby grows and you should trust it. Here is more to know … in no particular order.
The New Parent Guides to This, That & the Other Thing
The New Parent Guides to This, That & the Other Thing• YOUR CHILD’S BEST ROADMAP TO GROWING UP IS YOU
Every time you say or do something, your baby will observe your behavior. From infancy, children gain language and other skills from you. Your challenge is to provide positive examples: show respect to others and yourself; keep a positive outlook; value health; limit anger; practice positive communication skills.
• TEACH YOUR BABY TO SLEEP
During Baby’s first year of life, you will work at establishing his sleep. But no matter what your baby’s age is, establishing a consistent bedtime routine will encourage good sleep habits. It will take time. Practice the A-B-Cs of safe sleep (Alone, on the Back and in a Crib); no blankets or toys in the crib. Learn more at the American Academy of Pediatrics at aap.org (search “safe sleep.”).
• BABIES GIVE READINESS CUES
From weaning to feeding solids to potty training to learning to ride a bike, your child will give you cues as to when they are ready. Be a parent who tunes into your child’s development.
• YOU ARE FOREVER CHANGED WHEN YOU HAVE A BABY
Adjusting to life with a newborn is adjusting to a new normal. Prepare in advance as much as possible for the changes coming; reach out to create your support network and seek advice from your pediatrician when you have a health or development concern about your baby.
• NARRATE THE DAY FOR YOUR INFANT
Talk to your newborn from the start, describing what you’re doing as you care for them and responding when your baby makes sounds. This is the beginning of good communication and a strong relationship.
• YELLING AND BABIES AND CHILDREN IS HARMFUL
A study in The Journal of Child Development says yelling at children produces results similar to physical punishment. Yelling produces anxiety, stress and depression, so guard against it and seek help if it’s an issue.
• YOU DON’T NEED TO MAKE A HAPPY BABY HAPPIER
If they’re happy playing with a wooden spoon for 10 minutes, leave them alone!
• EVERYTHING IS A PHASE
“Cluster feeding?” a phase. “Contact napping?” a phase.
The hard times will pass, and soon, your newborn will grow into a tiny person who will climb into your lap, and find ways to make you laugh.
• GET TO KNOW BABY
This human in front of you is not a schedule/plan/program. Do what feels right in terms of your day -to-day life and follow your Baby’s lead.
• IN THE EARLY DAYS, SLEEP WHEN BABY SLEEPS
It must be said. Once your baby is more established with predictable naps, you can use that time for household chores.
• SOMETIMES THE FLOOR IS THE SAFEST
A baby can’t roll off the floor. A baby CAN roll off a bed, changing table, chair, couch, etc. It’s why so many people say you can skip the diaper changing table.
• NOTHING LASTS FOREVER
This is good, mental check advice. There will be good days and days when you get nothing done but caring for the baby. It won’t always be this way and it helps to keep it in mind.
• SUPPORT YOUR PARTNER AND ALLOW THEM TO DO BABY THEIR WAY
As long as your partner keeps safety in mind, there’s no need to correct or undermine your partner who is also the other half of the equation!
• WALK AWAY AND BREATHE FOR FIVE MINUTES
If you are feeling overly stressed or fatigued and sort of at the end of your nerves, take five. It’s OK to put the baby down in their crib to walk away and breathe. Leave the room, take five then go back.
• ONLY GIVE GROWING TOTS THE CHOICES YOU WANT THEM TO HAVE
Use commands over “yes” or “no” questions, but give them a choice. As in, “Choose a toy to bring with you in the car.”
